Misophonia

I didn't know that the misery I have endured for as long as I can remember, not
only has a name, but isn't as uncommon as it seemed at first. When Kelly Ripa
mentioned Misophonia on her show, I was curious. Not having insurance, I've been
left to research on my own without real medical advice and though I don't have
an official diagnosis, I am quite certain that I am a sufferer of Miso/4S.



One of my earliest memories is being taken to a therapist because I could not
focus during class in first grade. I have to wonder if I wasn't affected by this
from that early of an age. I was diagnosed with Anxiety Disorder in my twenties.


Currently 38 years old, mother of two, freelance graphic designer and artist,
leader of girl scouts and cub scouts, and feeling like I finally have some
answers for so many things. Just KNOWING that my rage isn't a voluntary response
has already helped so much in coping with this issue.


My auditory triggers include: chewing, snoring, lip smacking, gum chewing, knee
bouncing, tapping, whining, certain voices, loudness in small spaces, video game
sounds, nail/cuticle picking, teeth sucking, slurping, cat/dog scratching or
licking, metal utensils scraped on dishes or teeth, ticking clocks, music thru
walls, and many other sounds that others seem to be triggered by as well.


It surprises me the repetitive sounds that I actually find comforting, like
cricket and cicadas. I even have a cricket farm for feeding my chameleon and I
sometimes find myself focusing on the sound of their chirping to calm the rage.


I do wonder though, how many other misophonia sufferers are also smokers? I know
it's a horrible habit and I do try to lessen the effects on my health by rolling
my own cigarettes with organic tobacco. But any time I have tried to quit, I
have found that I am FAR more reactive to my triggers. I quit when pregnant, but
didn't last long past delivery before I started again.


I also wonder if this condition contributes to my depression and inability to
trust others. I mean, if the sound triggers invoke rage and before now, I hadn't
made that connection, it seems like so many other things could be directly
related.


Some helpful links I've come across:


The Similarities Between Misophonia and Sensory Processing
The Posion Within: Living With Misophonia
I May Have Misophonia, But I’m Not Crazy!
Misophonia: When Nerve-Grating Noises Send You into a Rage